In an exclusive interview with Living Gulf, Dr Vassiliki Simoglou discusses the emotional realities of IVF, pregnancy and early parenthood for expatriate couples navigating life away from traditional family support systems in the UAE.
1. In your experience, how does living away from extended family networks change the emotional experience of fertility treatment or early parenthood for expatriates in the UAE?
Living away from extended family often means that couples experience fertility treatment and early parenthood with heightened emotional intensity. Expatriate couples navigating IVF, pregnancy or postpartum challenges, miss out on the practical and emotional scaffolding that family typically provides. This can give rise to feelings of loneliness, emotional exhaustion, and can have implications on the couple’s relationship, since the two partners can feel very much alone in trying to be each other’s entire support system. In the right doses, though, this can foster greater independence and emotional closeness between them, particularly because they learn to function as a stronger team.
2. What are the most common emotional gaps you see among expat couples who do not have immediate family support during IVF, pregnancy, or postpartum phases?
The most common emotional gaps include lack of practical support, withdrawal, and difficulty reconnecting. Many couples feel they have nowhere to emotionally offload, especially during repeated IVF cycles or difficult postpartum adjustments. Others struggle with the imbalanced emotional and physical involvement in the procedures. IVF can create distance within some couples, particularly when one partner is more physically and psychologically immersed in treatment than the other.
For example, a husband may not undergo procedures himself, but simply attending consultations, being present at the clinic, and participating actively alongside his wife can foster emotional connection and a deeper sense of mutual understanding.
3. Does the absence of traditional family structures intensify anxiety, pressure, or decision-making stress around fertility and parenthood? If so, how does this typically manifest?
Yes, for many couples it does. Without trusted family guidance nearby, couples often carry the full emotional and decision-making burden alone. This can manifest as increased anxiety, over-researching, especially with the use of AI, indecisiveness, emotional burnout, or conflict within the relationship. However, it is important to underline that family involvement is not universally protective. Depending on the cultural context, traditional family systems can range from deeply supportive to emotionally intrusive or pressuring.
Some couples living in joint family systems, actually deliberately choose not to disclose fertility treatment in order to avoid overinvolvement, influence, or pressure around timelines, treatment choices, or expectations regarding parenthood.
4. How do expat couples typically compensate for the lack of familial support systems? Do you see reliance on partners, friendships, or professional support increasing significantly?
In the absence of nearby family, we often see couples relying much more heavily on each other, close friendships, or even seeking professional support. For some couples, the experience strengthens emotional intimacy and deepens empathy and consideration toward one another. Others may intentionally build “chosen family” systems, their own “village”, through friendships or parenting communities which are particularly active in the UAE.
Equally, psychological support is becoming an increasingly important part of the transition into parenthood, particularly in high-pressure fertility journeys.
5. In your clinical experience, are there particular emotional patterns or coping mechanisms that are more common among expat patients compared to those with close family proximity?
Expat patients often come across as self-reliant and emotionally contained, albeit sometimes to the point of isolation. Many cope by compartmentalising emotions and maintaining highly functional professional lives, while struggling emotionally privately. What I have observed working in the UAE, has been elective disclosure patterns. Couples whose families live abroad often carefully choose what they share, depending on the quality of their relationship with their family. Some can still receive meaningful emotional support remotely, while others may experience criticism and minimisation, even from a distance. As a result, many expatriates place increased value on internal safety and emotionally safe spaces, where they can feel understood without judgment.
6. What role can psychological support or structured counselling play in helping expat individuals build emotional resilience when they are navigating major life transitions without a traditional support network?
Navigating major life transitions away from family can lead to reactivate early separation experiences and attachment ruptures. The holding experience of psychotherapy can address these issues. It is about understanding why these transitions feel as heavy as they do, what meaning a person has attached to becoming a parent, to their body, to waiting, and to loss. This kind of meaning creation can allow a person to achieve self-acceptance and build genuine resilience.
At the level of the couple, counseling can allow to identify relational patterns that keep repeating themselves, a deeper understanding of each other and a return to empathy and fondness. Therapy compensates for the lack of a support system, and provides a consistent, attuned, non-anxious safe space, that over time becomes internalised. This internalised concept of self-knowledge becomes the basis of emotional resilience that individuals can carry forward, long after the sessions end.
